HOW TO FEEL WORTHY

The definition of worthy is someone or something that has desirable qualities and is entitled to respect or attention. An example of someone who would be described as worthy of an award is a person who has all the qualities required to obtain the award. Honorable; admirable. A worthy fellow. If you’re worthy because of accomplishments or the accolades of others, that means your worthiness is at the mercy of other people’s opinions. There is no power or stability in this.

I used to be trapped into a negative self-perception of self-worth. I felt like I didn’t deserve of things that I do have. I also lacked a lot of general life knowledge which put me in my mind that I’m behind in life.

The worst part is that I kept on telling myself every day that I’m just not worthy. This engraved deeply in crevices of my mind which was complicated to get rid of.

Words have a lot of power – similarly like a kid being told that he’s the best in everything. Eventually he’ll start believing it and feel more confident and worthy of everything: candies, bicycles, toys, etc.

This is the almost the same situation, except the opposite. However, it’s completely possible to heal your wounds and I’ll show you how.

10 Reasons Why You Feel Not Worthy

Feeling not worthy happens due to self-esteem issues. The longer you sink in your self-pity, the worse the situation gets.

  1. You feel lifeless, bland, regular
  2. You insist yourself on the idea that you feel not worthy (scarcity mindset)
  3. You feel sorry and can’t help yourself
  4. You are angry at everyone for being happier than you
  5. You are in despair of hopelessness and that nothing can improve the situation
  6. You feel as if nobody supports you
  7. You keep on disappointing yourself and other people
  8. You feel like you lack skills and general life knowledge
  9. You don’t accept opportunities that life offers you
  10. You’ve been hurt by others and your self-esteem got damaged

Practical Ways To Feel Worthy

1. Take Meaningful Risks In Life

To improve ourselves, we must constantly challenge ourselves. Sometimes this saying can sound exhausting, daunting, depressing. Sometimes it can sound like joy or the biggest gift of your life.

Everything has to start from our mindsets. If we possess scarcity mindset, we’ll never be able to embrace happiness.  The world will look dull, stressing and dark place to live in.

Instead, we have to adopt abundance mindset, which can help us to embrace a healthy outlook to the world. We’ll cheerfully accept all challenges of our lives and will never stop on improving.

Having said that, you have to take risks in your life. No, it doesn’t have to be jumping off a cliff from 100 ft. to an ocean or sea. What I mean is, that you have to open up and start expressing your feelings to people, take well-thought financial risks that can improve your life in the future, do the travelling around the world and beating the fear of speaking with strangers and similar.

All of your meaningful experiences will add up and you’ll feel like a whole different person in a good way. In our modern ways we are used to live very passively. Instead, start embracing life in an active way.

How to practice:

Meaningful risks are done by weighing the positives and the negatives. If the negatives far outweigh the positives, definitely don’t do it. If, for example, your chances to succeed are 1% or 5%, then it’s far too low. In other words, 1 out of 20 risks will pay off at best.

Instead, think smarter instead of playing harder. Set up a proper set of actions to minimize the risks as much as possible and go for it.

All of your meaningful experiences will add up and you’ll feel like a whole different person in a good way. In our modern ways we are used to live very passively. Instead, start embracing life in an active way.

It’s a tragic that we recognized our self worth from external validation. – Aditya Ajmera

Meaningful risks in life can be:

  • Getting hurt from other people (trying to chat with other people and then get rejected, or acknowledging your feeling to your crush)
  • Being responsible for someone else you love or like
  • Letting go of relationships and starting new ones
  • Helping someone else without any return of appreciation
  • Growing in life with possibility of failures and discomforts (learning how to be a leader, investing into assets, learning new skills…)

2. Avoid comparing yourself with others. Comparison weakens your self-reliance and causes you to feel less than. Think of a bloom––it blooms amid many other blooms and does not compare itself to all those blooms, instead it does what it was made to do––bloom.[1]Comparison with others can lead to bitterness that you’re missing out on things. This can cause you to feel less worthy too because instead of concentrating on what you have, you only see what you don’t have.

Walk away from any person who causes you to feel that you have to prove your own worth. That person is not healthy for you.

3.Learn how to appreciate other people’s achievements. Criticizing others comes as a result of your inferiority complex and does little to help build your self-worth. If you appreciate other people’s work, others will always appreciate you, which is a form of respect and satisfaction that adds to your sense of self-worth

4. Finish What You’ve Started

People tend to jump from one task to another without finishing the first one fully. People naturally seek for excitement and ways to entertain themselves. As a result, they are looking for something new to do.

Usually, people only scrape the top of their tasks before reaching the actual core. This phenomenon creates within themselves dissatisfaction of their work and achievements. For sure, it can be fun at first hopping from one task to another, but in the long run people will realize that this doesn’t lead anywhere, unless they are very ignorant.

If you’d ask me “How do you know this?”, then the answer is very simple. It’s from personal experience and observations. My father, to be fair, never finished a single thing in his life: growing up kids, finishing fixing cars, finishing his house, has almost zero savings in his bank account, has a doubtable relationship with another woman. However, that’s a whole different story. My point is, that you’ll never feel accomplished if you’ll keep getting distracted by environment.

How to practice:

Make a list of sequential tasks for your end goal. In this way, you’ll have a general picture how to achieve your goal that you want to accomplish. If you’d only think of “I want to purchase a house” without a real plan, chances are that you’d waste a few additional years without a sequence of actions and strategies.

To illustrate this, you’d always start a recipe from going to the grocery shop, buying the goods, washing and preparing them, cutting/processing, baking, cooking, etc. You can’t go the other way around (unless it’s the reverse engineering method). The same goes with your plans and goals.

Remember why you started. We tend to get carried away by environmental distractions. Therefore, it’s important to always keep in mind your priorities. You’ll start regretting that you postponed your guitar practicing and playing for 10 years or that you didn’t take care of your skin when you should’ve. Remember why you are chasing your dreams.

5. Hop Into Your Inspirational Person’s Shoes

Most of us have a person that we adore or would like to be just as them. Perhaps, it wouldn’t be the best idea to be 100% that person. Instead, it’s better to pick a few positive traits out of him/her and practice that.

We can learn a lot of valuable life lessons from our idols. However, it’s important to always keep in mind to sustain our personality and be who we are and not who we idealize. Our uniqueness is what makes us real and alive.

The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely. – C.G. Jung

How to practice:

Think of a person that you admire. Perhaps it’s your uncle? Maybe an actor, entrepreneur or a singer? Define that person clearly.

Decide why you admire this person. Is it because that person has an astonishing voice, communication skills or maybe he’s very creative? Define these characteristics of a person.

Study about what made this person have such characteristics and skills. Is it because he worked hard to acquire those characteristics, skills and success? Analyze how it happened.

Adapt it for yourself. When you have an idea where these amazing traits of your idol came from, you can mimic it and apply to yourself. Road of achieving that kind of success will never be 100% exact the same as your idol had to undergo. It will be different for every person and that’s absolutely okay.

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